| | So a position is potentially opening up in Fort Smith. While I don't
want to leave, I almost wonder if it's time. It's still just talk
though, so we more than likely won't end up there, but who knows?
I love my job. It is the best thing about staying here in Springfield.
But
things just aren't going right... I feel indebted to help those around
me that I don't think I can help anymore and it's getting to a point
where it's too stressful on me and my marriage and on my relationship
with that person. I almost wonder if distance between us would fix some
of the problems. But I don't know for sure.
I think I am ready
for a fresh start. I want to get involved in a women's group with women
MY age. I want to have women I can relate to in my life. As for right
now, I don't. I mean I do have meaningful friendships here and there,
but it's not sustaining me because life is just too weird right now for
them and for me, I think.
And most of all, I'm praying for God
to send me a special friend that is in the same place in their life as
I am. Someone I can REALLY relate to. Someone who knows when I call
them crying about my test results or my desire for a child or my pain
that I feel because of my situation with hubby's job or even just
dealing with the stresses of being a new wife.
I love my friends
that I have now, but we are in completely different areas in our lives
and it's difficult to understand each other, I think. Especially with
my best friend (I'm not talking about you in this case, T... don't
worry 
). She is so caught up in her own life and her own stresses that she
has no time to be concerned with anyone else. And I feel like I've been
giving, giving, giving with nothing in return. But I don't think she's
in a place where she CAN return any of that. And I'm not upset about
it... it's just an observation, I guess. That, and the fact that the
people with whom she chooses to associate hate me anyways.
These
are my thoughts. Don't be offended if you think something here was
targeted at you in particular. It's just my thoughts... and I do not
mean to offend anyone. |
| | Posted 5/23/2007 2:19 PM - 34 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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